so, my life has been rather hectic of late. what with volleyball and basketball and school and homecoming and football games and church and family and friend time, i'm pretty busy! right now i am getting a little ahead in homework, doing a book report. i don't really have much i want to say, nothing has happened lately that was really blog-worthy. i'm trying to keep myself so busy that i can hold the illusion of joy and happiness and all those other things i'm supposed to be feeling intact. when i think too much i make myself fall apart. i feel like i'm nothing but a vague reflection. a mirror made of glass that could shatter at any moment. but i hope i'm stronger than that. maybe i'm made of steel. okay, enough with the really weird symbolism. i have been reading brit lit too long!
just wanted to let the people who read this know that i'm still alive.
it just gets worse and worse, doesn't it?
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3 comments:
I'm very glad that you're still alive. I am too actually, though you wouldn't be able to tell it from all you've heard of me in the last... oh my... Has it really been 2 months!? Oh dear... I'm very sorry Natalie. I'll try to write very soon. At least sometime this week.
...thinking of various comments about this post, but can't think how to put them in words. I guess the basic idea is some sympathy for having to "hold the illusion of joy and happiness" rather than feeling truly joyful and happy. I wonder how exactly you feel. Is the business to avoid thinking entirely, and just focus on going on despite any struggles and stuff? Or is it to drive unwanted thoughts from your mind and focus on things that do actually make you happy? Or am I totally missing it and it's nothing like either of those?
Anyway... I'll try to email you soon Natalie. Take care.
With love from your bro,
Ray
...strange. I thought for sure that I saw that that was posted today... Instead, I see that it's nearly a month old. ...strange again: I though for sure I'd checked this more recently than September 13th...
Sorry for my very late comment.
you need to blog more often, okay girl.
Bye,
your friend
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